I don't know how to be anyone other than who I am.... I refuse to change for anyone. I sure as hell am not going to sit around and let anyone treat me badly or make me feel insignificant.

Let me remind those of you who read this of a few things. I am an incredible, intelligent, loving, person. It has taken me a long time to realize and appreciate these things about myself, but I do and I won't let anyone downplay it. I have had friends that don't appreciate my friendship and that turned out to be hurtful and untrustworthy. I have 'partners' that were the same.

Let's talk about my most recent experience. I start talking to a man. He says incredibly beautiful and wonderful things to me. Anything and everything I could ever hope to hear. He seems to be almost a perfect fit. Right off the bat we talk about how important communication is to both of us. We are completely honest about everything. (Or at least I am, I can only be accountable for what I say.) I am enjoying time with him, I am comfortable with him, I feel safe with him. It's been awhile to say the least.

Mistake #1 - He makes plans with me for my birthday and then cancels on me at about 8pm. Too late for me to make other plans. I had my makeup on, nails done, house cleaned, was all pretty, just to see him. I spent the rest of the night crying. The next day was Mother's Day, I didn't get to see my kids. I sat all alone that day as well. (Now he was with his mother, so it was family stuff, and I dropped it.)

Mistake #2 - It is now May 29th, my birthday was May 12th...... he never did anything for my birthday. never brought me a dandelion he picked from the lawn. Never picked up a card at Walmart or the gas station. He is an incredible artist, he could've just drew me a picture. Nothing.

Mistake #3 - He told me on several occasions that he liked to stay in contact and let me know what was going on in his life in the first week and a half. He always said "good night", he always talked to me throughout the day. It has gotten to be less and less. To me that says, you don't think of me that often, you don't want to talk to me, and you just aren't that into me. I don't need constant contact, I am not that needy. But I do like to hear from my guy once in awhile. I like to know that I am on his mind.

Mistake #4 - He decides not to return my phone calls or texts before he leaves out of town for Memorial Day weekend. Then while out of town, he manages to post status messages, and answer what people write on his statuses, but he doesn't write back to me, call me, or text me back. I communicate with him that this is upsetting to me. I still don't hear from him.


I am a grown ass woman. I have 2 children. I have a disease that attacks my body every single fucking day. I have enough problems. I want a partner in my life, someone who will be by my side. Someone who WANTS to be there. Someone who adores me, who can't stand to not talk to me, or not be around me.

I really liked this guy........ I thought he was decent and good................. Actions speak louder than words, and I won't let someone treat me this way. I'm better than that.